Best Friend

At one time in my life I wanted to have a marriage just like the one my best friend had. Heck, at that time any marriage was better than the one I had. They seemed to get along so well and could say anything to each other and still kiss and say I love you. Years later I discovered what I really needed was friendship in my marriage. I hadn't really ever thought about it that way. I had heard people say that your spouse should be your best friend, but that sounded crazy to me. How could I share the things I shared with my best friend with my husband?

One day while riding in my car, it hit me. I call it a 'spipiphany' (spiritual epiphany). lol I would do anything for my best girlfriend. All she had to do was ask and if I had it, I gave it. If she needed me to work a special event for free, I did it.  If she upset me, I let it roll off and never held a grudge. Why wasn't it that way with my husband?  It was that way with my best friend because I knew she had my best interest at heart and would do for me exactly what I did for her. I didn't feel like my husband was that way when it came to me. (another blog about that to come) It was that day, that I realized that LOVE really is a choice. I chose to love my best friend. We aren't related and I've known her for a less amount of time than I've been with my husband. I trusted her with my life. Why not my husband?

We choose to love our friends everyday. Why not make a simple choice to love your spouse everyday no matter what. Think about friendship and what it means to you. Is your spouse your friend? When I talked to my husband about this he was completely on board. He agreed that we were not friends, but neither of us knew how to get there.

After years of ups and downs in our marriage we realized what was needed in order to accomplish this fete. TOTAL TRANSPARENCY and TRUST.  We both gave each other our passwords to all email accounts, face book account and cell phone codes.  We chose to think the best about each other and to love no matter what. After establishing that divorce was not an option we discovered the best friendship either of us had ever had and it was with one another. He is my ace boon coon, my dude and I'm his girl.  We laugh together and we share everything that goes on in our lives. We put God first and then each other second.

He is my best friend. It took us over 10 years to get there, but we made it and I couldn't ask for a better friend.